Charlie Kirk and Erika Kirk on Biblical Marriage, Submission, and Raising a Conservative Family

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2,422 videos 1,389,747,653 views US Joined Aug 30, 2018

Charlie Kirk is the Founder and President of Turning Point USA, the largest and fastest growing conservative youth activist organization in the country with over 250,000 student members, over 150 full-time staff, and a presence on over 2,000 high school and college campuses nationwide. Charlie is also the Chairman of Students for Trump, which aims to activate one million new college voters on campuses in battleground states in the lead up to the 2020 presidential election. His social media reaches over 100 million people per month and according to Axios, he is one of the "top 10 most engaged" Twitter handles in the world. He is also the host of “The Charlie Kirk Show,” which regularly ranks among the top news shows on Apple podcast charts.

Charlie Kirk and Erika Kirk on Biblical Marriage, Submission, and Raising a Conservative Family

Charlie Kirk sits down with his wife, Erika Kirk, for a candid conversation about marriage, faith, and family. They tackle questions from listeners about biblical submission, why women should avoid dating apps, how men must lead financially, and what it means to prepare for parenthood. Erika shares why submission is liberating rather than limiting, explains the dangers of gossip and comparison, and reveals their decision to homeschool their children. From their engagement in 2020 to married life with kids, the Kirks open up about prioritizing Christ, raising children in a conservative household, and the essential traits men and women should seek in a spouse.

April 13, 2025

Marriage, Faith, and Conservative Family Values

Charlie Kirk welcomes his wife, Erika Kirk, for a special episode where they answer listener questions about marriage, faith, and raising children in a conservative Christian household. Married since 2021 and engaged in 2020, the couple has built their relationship on biblical principles and shared values that guide their approach to family life.

Erika, who describes herself as more conservative than Charlie, credits her upbringing for shaping her worldview. Her grandfather, a Swedish immigrant who fought in World War II and the Korean War and received the Silver Star and Bronze Star before being knighted by the King of Sweden, instilled in her a fiercely right-wing perspective. Both agree that having children made them even more conservative, with Erika noting it made her not only more grounded in her beliefs but also a better wife.

What Conservative Women Should Look For in Men

When asked what traits conservative women should seek in potential husbands, Erika emphasizes the importance of spiritual compatibility. "Make sure you're equally yoked," she explains. "The most important question is: will he lead you closer to Christ or further away?"

Erika expresses skepticism about dating apps, arguing that they make the process too easy for men who should be actively seeking out a wife rather than passively swiping. "Women get upset when they go on a date with a guy they found on an app and all of a sudden they ghost them," she says. "It's because the guy didn't have to hunt for them. You want to be so much more than just a number."

She acknowledges that while some people have found their spouses on apps, the likelihood is much lower. Instead, she recommends asking local pastors for guidance and being intentional about the search for a spouse.

For men seeking women, the couple emphasizes the importance of finding someone willing to embrace biblical roles in marriage—specifically, a non-feminist woman who understands and values submission.

Biblical Submission: Liberating, Not Limiting

The topic of submission generates numerous listener questions, and Erika addresses it head-on. "For me as a wife, my biblical role is to be the helpmate to my husband," she explains. "That does not mean I'm less than you and that does not mean that I am above you. I love that you lead our home."

Erika describes submission as beautiful and liberating when understood correctly. "You are in charge of what you're in charge of. Your husband's in charge of what he's in charge of. It's supposed to be a beautiful marriage of teamwork."

She points to Ephesians 5, which calls both husbands and wives to "submit to one another out of reverence for Christ," emphasizing that both are called to serve and prioritize each other's needs. However, she notes that many women struggle with the concept due to feminist ideology that has seeped into Christian culture.

"I think Christianity itself has become semi-feminized," Erika says, pointing to what she calls "Pinterest Christianity" with flowery designs and feminine fonts. "The Bible has nothing to do with being feminine or being masculine. It's all about Jesus. It's all about God."

She also stresses that submission only works when men are prepared to lead. "That's not a light role to carry, being the leader of the home," she explains. "What happens is men who aren't prepared for that season of life leave the metaphorical pants on the ground, and women come in and put those pants on because they feel like they have to."

The Dangers of Gossip and Comparison

Erika offers strong advice to married women: never gossip about your husband to friends. "What you talk about with your spouse behind closed doors needs to stay there," she insists. "You have to continually invest in the confidence in one another that you're on the same team."

She also warns against comparing husbands. "Do not compare your husband to other women's husbands. Hank does XYZ so well with a hammer—well, my husband doesn't do that. Do what your husband's good at. Someone else's husband might not be good at that."

Most importantly, she cautions mothers not to forget their husbands in the chaos of raising children. "Don't forget your husband in the process. Children are a blessing from the Lord, but don't forget your husband."

Financial Leadership Belongs to Men

Charlie and Erika are emphatic that men must take complete control of family finances. "Men, you should be completely in charge of finances," Charlie states. "Your wife should have nothing to do with it. They can have input, but you should release that burden from your wife and just take care of all the money."

Erika agrees wholeheartedly. "Having to provide for yourself as a woman is exhausting," she says, recalling her time living independently in New York City. "I love the fact that I can relinquish that role to my husband because he's so good at it. That is one less thing I have to deal with."

Charlie adds that if a man is not capable of handling finances, he should not get married. "If you are marrying a man that is not capable of completely and totally handling the finances, you should not marry that man. Finances will break a marriage quicker than anything else. Period."

He explains that men are hardwired to produce for their families and find meaning in provision. "We as men find great purpose in being able to come back home being like, 'We provided for all of this.'"

Charlie offers practical financial advice: avoid borrowing money, don't carry credit card debt (though you can use credit cards if you pay them off monthly), and the only acceptable debt is a mortgage. "If you just start with that principle, you're going to be in a much better spot," he says.

Preparing for Parenthood

When asked how young married couples should prepare for children, the Kirks emphasize several key points. First, couples should seek premarital counseling and always put their spouse first. Second, they should save money—specifically, creating a fund for overnight help rather than spending on items babies will quickly outgrow.

Erika warns against becoming too fixated on birth plans. "Don't be so fixated and obsessed with 'I am going to have a child on my couch in my living room, free birth, no drugs,' and then leave no room for God's will," she advises, noting that their own birth plan went completely awry except for the fact that they had a child.

Charlie stresses that couples should identify and address any "fleshly problems" before welcoming children—whether that's gossip, spending issues, alcohol, pornography, or drug problems. "Try to get those things settled before you enter kids into the world," he says.

Most importantly, men must be earning enough money so that mothers don't have to work. "If the man is incapable of doing that, then figure it out. Become a man," Charlie states bluntly.

Why Married Women with Kids Are Happiest

Studies show that married women with children are the happiest demographic, and Erika believes this aligns with nature and God's design. "Becoming a CEO of a shoe company is not going to give you happiness," she says. "Women have it so mixed up. You can have a career after children."

She firmly rejects the concept of work-life balance. "There is no such thing as balance. That is such a myth. You have to choose where your heart has to be, and it has to be fully with the home."

Using a toy as an analogy, she explains: "Gigi gets these little monastery toys with buckets that balance. If I put something in one of those buckets, it's going to drop down. I can't spend half of the day doing one thing. I missed out half of that time with the kids."

Erika encourages women to embrace their season with children. "You can always go back to work after your kids are in school or in high school," she says. "But if you miss those precious first few years, that is so hard to make up because memories are so much more important than an added paycheck."

Dealing with Hate and Death Threats

Asked about handling hate from Charlie's public work, Erika says she's grateful for how God has "pruned" her life. "I've lost family members, I've lost friends, but God has pruned my life in a way where I am surrounded in a circle now by people who love us, support us, pray with us, encourage us—a small mighty circle."

She embraces the opposition. "Do I get hate? Bring it on. I'll have a velvet steel spine by the end of my life. I have nothing to fear."

Charlie adds that while they receive many death threats, it's simply part of life. Erika offers a provocative perspective: "If you are out there and you aren't getting a lot of hate, then what are you doing? You're not doing anything that bothers Satan. You're just being boring."

Homeschooling and Education Plans

The Kirks plan to homeschool their children, at least initially. Erika admits she was initially "horrified" thinking about teaching subjects like math and geometry, but has become excited about the prospect.

"I think women lose a portion of their brain capacity after every single kid because then you get excited to homeschool your kids and relearn everything all over again," she says with a laugh. "You get excited about learning about triangles and octagons and proper grammar."

Practical reasons also drive their decision. They want to travel with the kids, and Erika doesn't want their children facing bullying because of Charlie's public profile. "I do not want to deal with kids going up to either of our children and being like, 'I hate you because of your father,'" she explains.

They plan to eventually enroll the children in traditional school around sixth, seventh, or eighth grade, particularly for sports opportunities. Erika also mentions pod schooling as an alternative, where families share a teacher who comes to one home.

She encourages others to consider homeschooling and challenges those who can't to examine their reasons why.

Favorite Memories and Final Thoughts

When asked about favorite memories, both point to their trip to Israel as their top pre-kids experience. Erika reveals that she had been to Israel previously with her mother on a pilgrimage, where she prayed for her future husband at every opportunity—not knowing Charlie was in Israel at the same time. "I was praying for you, and we were both in Israel at the same time," she tells Charlie. "Getting to go back with you was surreal."

Post-kids, they treasure milestone moments like Gigi's dance class, where she recently performed the Trump dance, and family trips to Maine and Jackson Hole.

The couple closes by promoting Bible365.com, their ninth year of reading the Bible cover to cover in 365 days. "We do not miss a day," Erika emphasizes. "It's a very special unique community where you can get your Bible readings texted to you, emailed to you, or through the app. We're real humans, not bots."

Throughout the conversation, the Kirks model a marriage built on biblical principles, mutual respect, clear roles, and shared faith. Their advice is uncompromising: men must lead and provide, women must embrace their God-given roles, both must prioritize Christ and each other, and children are a blessing to be welcomed and nurtured in a conservative Christian home.

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