Erika Kirk on Guarding Your Home, Loving Your Husband Well, and Staying Present in Motherhood

[00:01] hey I'm Delise and I'm Jenny we know that  parenting comes in seasons and even the  

[00:05] smallest wins deserve a happy dance join  us as we chat with moms in every stage  

[00:10] of the parenting Journey fixing our eyes on  Jesus each step of the way this is blessings  

[00:16] and motherhood because we believe that you  can hold tissues and confetti at the same

[00:20] time hey guys welcome to another episode of  blessings in motherhood and today's conversation  

[00:28] is amazing we got to chat with Erica Kirk she  is an entrepreneur she has her own clothing  

[00:34] line called proclaimed Street Wear she has her  own podcast as well called the midweek rise up  

[00:39] and is also a a new mom to a 9-month-old little  baby girl uh you guys are not going to want to  

[00:44] miss it especially the encouragement she  gives at the end you don't want to miss

[00:49] out Erica welcome to blessings and motherhood  thank you for having me I'm stoked to be on  

[00:57] with you guys yeah this is awesome so for our  listeners Erica just tell them a little bit about  

[01:02] yourself and what season of life you're in right  now okay so my name is Erica Kirk I am a new mom  

[01:10] I have a beautiful she's nine months today I have  a beautiful nine-month-old um and I'm married to  

[01:16] my best friend uh Charlie and um you know life has  been life has been amazing in such a whirlwind in  

[01:25] a great way uh I was raised in Scottdale Arizona  I played basketball in college I was Miss Arizona  

[01:33] USA in 2012 I graduated from ASU after kind of a  eclectic route of university university stuff uh  

[01:44] and got a double major in political science and  international relations and then pursuing further  

[01:52] uh in from an educational standpoint I got a  jurist master in American legal studies and  

[01:58] now I am working on my doctor um for Christian  leadership and biblical studies so that's the  

[02:05] that's the educational route workwise I've been  an entrepreneur since I was little little I was I  

[02:11] saw that in my mom H she raised me ever since gosh  we moved out to Arizona when I was five because my  

[02:18] parents got a divorce when I was really young so  I was very blessed to have my mom's full attention  

[02:24] but also was able to see her grow a business  alongside of being a phenomenal mother to me  

[02:30] uh so again been an entrepreneur since I was 16  started a nonprofit from there I in 2018 started  

[02:38] a clothing company a Christian clothing company  called proclaimed Street Wear and I've we have a  

[02:45] podcast also called midweek rise up that releases  on Wednesdays we're relaunching though in June  

[02:51] and then something that's so near and dear to my  heart that has been going on for seven years now  

[02:56] is called Bible and 365 and I feel so honored  and blessed to be the leader of that we have  

[03:02] gosh I want to say now almost 38,000 people with  us this year it started off with just me and a  

[03:09] girlfriend uh my her she's a dear friend of mine  named Jess who uh works with me now and she is  

[03:15] a part of Bible and 365 on the back end so yeah  again a very I guess you could say I'm a social  

[03:21] entrepreneur where I find little pockets within  a culture that I like to disrupt and uh make some  

[03:28] things happen so but yeah again I feel so honored  and blessed to be be on on air with you guys today  

[03:36] yeah thank you for sharing that well speaking of  your podcast I was listening to an episode of it  

[03:42] the other day and you guys definitely go check  it out the midweek rise up super encouraging  

[03:46] relaunching in June um and in that podcast  you talked about the Titus 2 woman and um it  

[03:53] was just really encouraging to hear you share a  little bit about the vision of what God has set  

[03:59] out for us as women and how we interact with one  another and our families um and so we'd love to  

[04:06] just kind of unpack that today and and just talk  a little bit about it tot totally yeah you made  

[04:12] some amazing points in that and one of them that  I really love and I gosh what is the exact verse I  

[04:19] do not know but you talk about how it um tells us  that we are working in the home but that I think  

[04:25] the Greek translation of it was that we are to  be the Guardians of the home and I was wondering  

[04:29] if you could unpack that a little bit more for our  listeners and and talk to them about how we can be  

[04:34] those Guardians of the home like the home is our  territory 100% And The Enemy would love nothing  

[04:40] more than to occupy that and I think a lot of  women think okay when I get married or when I have  

[04:46] kids I'm stuck in the house that's not at all what  it is uh you have the honor and blessing of being  

[04:53] within like your domain within your relationship  and within your Covenant is something so precious  

[05:00] which is the household and the safe space of your  family for your kids for your husband and within  

[05:06] those four walls that's your domain to teach about  Jesus to read scripture to be super involved with  

[05:13] your kids whether that's homeschooling or whether  they're going to a public school or a charter  

[05:18] school or private school Christian School being  so immersed in their life and what an honor and  

[05:25] truly instead of looking at it as I have to it's  I get to and we I think as women and as moms need  

[05:33] to stay focused on yes we have desires of our  hearts but what are our obligations and what  

[05:39] are our obligations as a woman and as a as a wife  as a mother as a child of God and really dig into  

[05:48] those and create a space within your home that is  a place where your kids and your husband and your  

[05:55] family can come and find rest and refuge and and  just in peace amongst the craziness of the world  

[06:02] that we're in today yeah definitely I love what  you said about just wanting to not only guard the  

[06:10] home but to create an environment that's safe yeah  and um I know even just thinking back over the  

[06:17] years there are so many spaces that I've walked  into where I've known immediately like nobody had  

[06:22] to tell me I've known in this space I am safe I am  safe to be myself I am safe to seek the Lord I am  

[06:29] safe to rest like I could take a nap on your couch  if I wanted to I could actually be safe here and I  

[06:37] think you know what we're talking about is kind of  lofty and and that's a good thing there's nothing  

[06:42] wrong with that but I think sometimes what I need  is for us to really put some hands and feet on it  

[06:48] and and to get into okay so what does that mean  and while I was just thinking and praying about  

[06:53] this for this podcast I started thinking about the  fact that okay if I'm trying to create that there  

[06:58] have got to be areas like what you said where the  enemy would like nothing more but to steal from my  

[07:05] family and from my environment and what are some  of those areas so that I can put my guard up and  

[07:10] be proactive not just say oh no what happened here  but to say you know what I've already put these  

[07:15] fenes in my life can you think of some some areas  where you know that you're already proactively  

[07:20] moving forward to guard your your space 100% And  that and honestly it it I think a big one which  

[07:28] is kind of um I guess kind of not out there but  uh something that we've done recently especially  

[07:36] myself of spearheading is really taking a look at  the environment from the standpoint of WiFi and  

[07:46] EMF and like really digging deep into the products  that you're using in your house the sprays that  

[07:55] you're using the different fragrances that are in  your house perfumes the body washes the lotions  

[08:03] like really digging deep into those uh for me it  was something even too from the standpoint of like  

[08:11] when if you're cooking what are you cooking okay  well what's in it is it grass-fed grass finished  

[08:17] is it grass-fed grain finished and like really un  like unpacking that and I know for some people are  

[08:23] like oh my gosh I don't have time to do that or I  don't have there are so many resources out there  

[08:28] that can help you like unpack certain things of  Healthy Living so again for us just to start like  

[08:36] I want to say maybe three weeks ago uh Charlie  came home and I was like I cut the internet and  

[08:41] he's like how am I supposed to work I was like I  got it all figured out I got it all figured out  

[08:47] so we hardwired everything hardwired our TVs our  computers um it made you more intentional of not  

[08:54] being able to use your phone to do certain stuff  because you have limited where we live we have  

[08:59] limited uh service in some spots of the house  so it's like eventually we're going to go back  

[09:06] to having a house phone because something that's  so I know I'm hopping all over here but it all  

[09:11] comes together syner synergistically when you cut  off certain things like that and you have limited  

[09:18] access to Wi-Fi or limited access on your phone  it helps to do something like the Sabbath where  

[09:25] you can truly honor it and say to your friends  and family if you truly need me and it's a deep  

[09:31] emergency please call our landline or have a  bat phone or have one phone that is used for  

[09:36] emergency line put in the kitchen store it away  and if someone needs you that's how they contact  

[09:40] you but for me it's like okay so in the house  what can we do to help holistically just with  

[09:48] our health and then also mentally making sure  that we are I mean honestly what you the voices  

[09:55] that you consume on a day-to-day basis will play  a huge role and influence in your your life what  

[10:00] are you watching on TV what are you listening to  what are you reading so just really making sure  

[10:07] that all of that points into to Christ but also in  alignment with where your family's goals mindset  

[10:15] morals heart is just really making sure all of  that's in alignment um and then to when it comes  

[10:22] to a healthy sleep environment I think that's  really underrated especially as an entrepreneur  

[10:28] when I was younger I used to think okay you can  sleep when you're dead I like to work in the late  

[10:34] evenings when I would before marriage before kids  my Prime Time hour was between 11:00 p.m. and 1:00  

[10:41] a.m. for creativity like that is where I was like  okay we're flourishing with this let's roll with  

[10:46] it uh but then the older that I got and the more  obviously that you have more people relying on you  

[10:53] it does not work like that and so I've become  kind of like Charlie and I both love to go to  

[10:58] bed around 8:30 p.m. and that is where we work  backwards from but again when you're a guardian of  

[11:04] your home making sure that everything within those  four walls are helping your family be locked up  

[11:13] with the Lord but also to making sure that they're  when they leave your front door they're ready for  

[11:21] whatever this world throws at them because they're  they're well charged they they're fitted with  

[11:29] scripture like they are ready to roll and they're  they're Fearless once they step out of your front  

[11:35] door yeah I think that's good and and I love to  Delise that you said you knew when you're going  

[11:41] into a safe environment and I thought maybe all  of us could think about when we have walked into  

[11:46] those safe environments what was it that we felt  made it safe like that was it the smell like I  

[11:53] totally agree with you Erica like when I walk into  a home and I smell I think it's lavender it's just  

[11:58] my smell of like I take a breath because it's just  that calming smell for me um so I didn't know Del  

[12:05] I know you said specifically you knew where you  were safe what was it about those spaces that  

[12:10] made them feel safe for both of you guys yeah I  mean they were fuss free to be honest and I mean  

[12:17] that that means a lot of different things but even  just beautifully decorated but not in such a way  

[12:22] that you feel like you can't sit on the couch  you know like there's a blanket out draped not  

[12:27] folded not to if you're folding your blankets is a  problem but just I'm pictur in a living room yeah  

[12:33] um and and also there was a smell of food which is  something that like we've talked about this on the  

[12:37] podcast before it's something I'm working really  hard on I had a great week I'm G celebrate last  

[12:42] week was a good food week for me that confetti  yes exactly just learning to Feed My People things  

[12:48] that they love you know and things that help them  to to relax there's something so disarming and I  

[12:53] think it there's surely a spiritual component to  it about eating good food F and being in a place  

[13:00] where you can you can actually process the food  like you even just think about the difference  

[13:04] between when you're eating food when you're  standing and eating food when you're sitting  

[13:07] there's something to that you know so that's kind  of what those spaces were like for me what about  

[13:10] you Erica no I totally agree just being in an  environment where you can literally come as you  

[13:16] are and you're like I've had a crazy horrible  day and I just need five minutes to breathe and  

[13:23] I'll get right back with you or like just being  able to be in a space where you know that you can  

[13:31] just breathe and be still and not have to worry  I'm if I'm being judged or if I'm being watched  

[13:38] or I mean I know even too with Charlie like his  my husband every move is watched and it's like  

[13:44] for him to be able to come home and just you know  play with the baby and breathe and you know just  

[13:51] listen to a podcast or just be able to journal  or you know have that space to be cozy and com  

[13:59] I think is important and I totally agree when it  comes to food I mean that is your that's your life  

[14:06] that that's important I mean it's in scripture  too it talks about certain things that I know it  

[14:10] was in the Old Testament of things to not eat and  to eat um but there is some truth to that still  

[14:15] to this day um I yeah I was going to circle back  around to what you were saying about just like the  

[14:21] the products that you use things that you put in  your body I'm very much at the beginning of this  

[14:25] journey and I'm trying to slow myself down it's so  fun yeah exactly it can be so overwhelming so fast  

[14:34] so but I had never even thought about it till I  became pregnant and then you know there's right a  

[14:39] whole know uhuh and I thought okay hang on so I'm  doing this for my son I'm not putting this thing  

[14:45] on myself for my son but I'm gonna put it on for  for me like are we sure 100% yeah and it it does  

[14:52] shift the way that you feel and you know if you're  listening and you're like hey I'm not ready for  

[14:56] that okay ask the Lord what you are ready for it's  fine if that's not it for you yet or now or ever  

[15:02] but but what we're saying is where are the areas  in your life that God is calling you to guard or  

[15:09] to step it up to just take a closer look at how  you're guarding your home because the enemy is  

[15:16] taking a very close look at the way that you are  guarding your home and just one more area before  

[15:21] we keep going that I think about is not rushing  um especially when I'm tired you know like if  

[15:28] it's bed time and I'm so tired and we have a a  bedtime routine that's really precious to me um  

[15:34] but there are days where you know you're thinking  okay let's get him in the bed because we got to  

[15:38] do this next thing and it's like no that's where  the enemy is trying to rob me yeah I have to slow  

[15:43] down because these moments are crucial you know  we're not getting them back and they go so fast  

[15:48] don't they I mean I've got four kids now and the  oldest one is eight and he was just a little baby  

[15:53] and and it goes by so dramatically but I love that  we're talking about this and and I especially love  

[16:01] that we're just we're in tune with it and we can  pray over it and I think that is a key factor so  

[16:07] you know all the things we're talking about here  like you said to Le some people may not be ready  

[16:11] for all of this um I'll be honest in our budget  I'm like how can I eat healthier I don't know  

[16:15] I've got to food costs are so high whole another  conversation um but I do want to feed my children  

[16:22] something better not the macaroni and cheese that  they want single day of the um but it's something  

[16:27] that I can pray over okay Lord please show this  to me reveal this to me maybe I stumble upon an  

[16:32] article or have a podcast like this that helps  me and I know I can hey maybe I can reach out  

[16:36] to Erica to see what she would tell me totally  um but it's just something to keep on our minds  

[16:41] and pray through and Erica I love how you are  so when I heard you talk about Charlie and as  

[16:47] he come home comes home and you just want it to be  safe for him it brings me to just a whole another  

[16:53] point of guarding our home and and how we can  love our husbands well in our home cuz I think  

[16:58] you said in that podcast our home isn't just the  four walls that surround us it's so much more than  

[17:04] that and our husbands are part of that not just  our children who take up a lot of our time a lot  

[17:10] of our energy mentally physically spiritually  even sometimes but our husbands are there too  

[17:15] so how can we love our husbands well in that in  being the Guardians of our home too that's such  

[17:21] a good question and I realized it even more once  having Gigi that when it's you are it's just the  

[17:31] two of you and I'll never forget our car ride  to the hospital before it all turned to insane  

[17:36] chaos it was a very chill ride at the hospital to  begin with but he we looked at each other and we  

[17:41] were like this is the last car ride we'll ever  have together that's just the two of us because  

[17:46] when we come home in this car the next time I'm  in this car and we'll have a little one with us  

[17:51] and that was really a surreal sentimental moment  but you're absolutely right our husbands that is  

[17:58] who we made the Covenant with along with God  obviously but they are our partner in all of  

[18:03] this and once the kids go to school or once they  go and get married you're back with your partner  

[18:10] and you don't I know that some people have the  empty nest syndrome situation but to me I feel  

[18:15] it's like that usually happens when you're  not in alignment with your partner throughout  

[18:21] every stage uh of the kids growth and through life  patterns and for me something that I well both of  

[18:30] us Charlie and are really intentional about this  but we always ask each other and check in with  

[18:34] each other every day like how are you doing how  can I serve you not in a way of a servant slave  

[18:40] relationship but in a beautiful way of how can  I be there to help you throughout your day how  

[18:46] can I make your day easier how can I love on you  today because sometimes it looks really different  

[18:50] dayto day sometimes it can be as simple as an  act of of you know doing something within the  

[18:56] kitchen or the house or something as simple as  a phone call or something as simple as a hug um  

[19:01] you know there's different ways that you can keep  the relationship with your husband Strong by just  

[19:07] making sure that you guys are communicating my  biggest thing I have even within my own company  

[19:13] I tell them I tell my employees all the time  you can never overc communicate you can underc

[19:28] turned off put in the drawer we don't he doesn't  touch his until Sunday uh around like 8:00 p.m.  

[19:35] U but I usually touch mine in the morning on  Saturday just because if something happens or  

[19:40] if my mom needs to reach me uh but that usually  we have our Friday nights together just to catch  

[19:47] up with each other but again I think it's really  important to remember that your husband is your  

[19:51] partner and although it's super tiring at the  end of the day and you know you're probably  

[19:59] at your wits ends with work and the kids and  everything and your husband's still just there  

[20:04] and just to be able to pour into them because  I know that we need to be poured into as well  

[20:08] but they need it too and they need that love and  attention too and it's not a point from you know  

[20:17] trying to I don't know how to explain it further  other than just to really just be there for them  

[20:23] and to love on them even though you're tired  like that's all going to go away someday soon  

[20:28] and so just to be able to stay in touch with them  and how you can serve them and serve each other I  

[20:33] think is really special all right listen up  blessings and motherhood families mark your  

[20:40] calendars for our annual National events  weekend from May the 2nd to the 4th 2024  

[20:46] in sunny Southern Pines North Carolina this is  presented by classical conversations foundation  

[20:52] and it's a time for cc families from around the  nation to experience together three full days of  

[20:58] events learning about classical education and  celebrating the hard work of fellow families  

[21:03] on the homeschooling Journey some of the major  events in the lineup this year are our beloved  

[21:09] National Conference where you can hear talks from  homeschool leaders like Lee and Robert Borton and  

[21:14] listen to a graduate and parent panel we've also  got National commencement this is our official  

[21:20] graduation ceremony for challenge graduates and  their parents and last but not least we also have  

[21:26] national memory Mass this is a championship  where 16 foundations finalists will compete  

[21:33] for the esteemed national memory Master title  and a grand prize of $10,000 plus there's also  

[21:41] a ton more on the agenda from food trucks to fun  celebration and even an outdoor adventure camp  

[21:47] so if your family hasn't yet been to the National  events weekend this is definitely your year to go  

[21:53] again the dates are May 2nd through the 4th 2024  so to learn more visit classical conversations  

[21:59] foundation.org and we hope to see you there yeah  and sometimes it's just even been as simple as  

[22:07] like okay I know he's going to be home in the  next 30 minutes let me sit down and take a cup  

[22:11] of tea so I can recharge so I can be ready so it's  not like he walks in the room and I'm like oh my

[22:16] gosh yeah sometimes that's unavoidable four kids  um but no I think the biggest word I'm hearing  

[22:26] here is is intentionality and to also remember you  know we've had a hard day whether we do work our  

[22:32] kids go to school we homeschool we've had that  hard day but so have they um and maybe we are  

[22:38] home when they get home but we can have those  little things and be intentional I know in our  

[22:43] home sometimes I just tell the kids all right  daddy's coming home let's pick up all the toys  

[22:48] on the floor so that Daddy can come home to a  clean spot or even yesterday we made homemade  

[22:53] Pino cheese southern thing and I said we've got  appetizer for daddy right when he gets home sweet  

[22:59] you know little things like that is what I think  of with loving him well and serving him well no  

[23:05] matter what's going on in our lives yeah because  he had a busy day at work too he probably missed  

[23:09] the kids some at work as well you know totally  totally and even just kind of taking care of  

[23:14] yourself not in not in a vain way but like brush  your hair maybe if you haven't brushed it in a  

[23:20] few days or like you know if you need to change  your shirt because there's spit up on it like  

[23:25] maybe just put on a different t-shirt or something  just you know take care of yourself sometimes it's  

[23:31] the little things and and I find too and I know  this is personality specific but for me sometimes  

[23:36] taking that time to take care of myself changes my  attitude totally and then and then I'm going to be  

[23:42] a more pleasant person to for you to come home  you're like I look human I put my contacts in I  

[23:48] have mascara on yeah totally be cute yeah exactly  uh it does change your perspective a good shower  

[23:56] and sometimes 100% I get those showers it's like  4:00 and I'm like I have not showered in 3 days  

[24:01] David is going to be home you know what you guys  go play take care of your little brother mommy is  

[24:06] just going to get in the shower even if that means  the little one comes in there with me cuz he needs  

[24:10] someone to look him there you go you know you can  always you can make it work right totally so you  

[24:16] said something earlier about um different seasons  of life and you were talking about you know empty  

[24:21] nesting which none of us have experienced yet but  in the podcast that I referenced at the beginning  

[24:28] of the show um something else that you mentioned  was just how we as women no matter how old we are  

[24:33] have this tendency to try to grab the next season  or maybe even three seasons Beyond where we are so  

[24:39] that could be a 12-year-old trying to act like a  22y old or even a 5-year-old wanting to be mommy  

[24:44] you know that's where I am yeah and on on the one  hand and I don't want to miss this I think some of  

[24:51] that is how God has made us in a really beautiful  way like we're good dreamers and we're great  

[24:56] Visionaries and we can understand what it's like  to emulate something and to anticipate it with  

[25:02] joy but sometimes it it looks like us breeding  discontentment right and we're reaching for  

[25:07] something that he simply doesn't have for us today  um and I'd love for us to just talk a little bit  

[25:13] about what it looks like for us to encourage each  other to to hold on to our season now you know and  

[25:21] like how would you define the season that you're  in take a look around what is the season that  

[25:25] you're in and then how are you you really slowing  down to hold on to it you no for sure so I'll  

[25:33] start I think a couple ways number one I would say  I'm in a season of like personal waiting because  

[25:42] first and foremost and forever I'm a I'm a woman  of God so in heaven I'm not going to be married  

[25:46] you know so this is who I am before Jesus so I'm  in a season of waiting that even with my garden  

[25:53] we hurry up and wait you know all your seeds are  in and it's just time to weed and and look at them  

[25:58] you know make sure you keep giving them water  um and the Lord was just kind of reminding me  

[26:03] like Del this is what faithfulness looks like it's  just sit and do the right thing and do the right  

[26:10] thing and do the right thing and it makes me think  of that verse that says you know let us not grow  

[26:15] weary in doing good for in due time we will reap a  harvest at that time you know we'll reap a harvest  

[26:22] later um and so just keep doing the right thing  but it looks the same way in motherhood you know  

[26:27] I have no idea how this is going to turn out but  I'm just trying to be consistent with these little  

[26:32] things because that's what all the older moms are  telling me you that consisteny is the key I know  

[26:37] so like okay let's keep taking your hand out of  your mouth is the key and then we're hoping that  

[26:43] it works but yeah what do you how do you guys feel  about your seasons of life and and what are those  

[26:48] things that you're working on leaning into it  it makes me think Erica of when you were talking  

[26:54] about Titus 2 and I I think I've written it down  I've written out of couple verses um and it makes  

[26:59] me think of staying in the present where we are  and it's Titus 2 verses 12 uh starts there for  

[27:06] the grace of God has appeared bringing salvation  for all people training us to renounce ungodliness  

[27:11] and worldly passions and to live self-controlled  upright and godly lives in the present age and  

[27:18] well I don't know the back context of Titus 2  at this moment but it makes me think like that's  

[27:22] God's way of calling me to be in the present um  and I think social media is not our friend in that  

[27:30] as women we can um just be scrolling and seeing  everybody else in the season above us or like d  

[27:35] said two seasons above us three seasons above  us um even Seasons we've already had and and  

[27:40] missing those Seasons um and it's it's scary but  right here God's saying be in the present this is  

[27:48] your time I have for you there's another time for  that was that Ecclesiastes have a season a time  

[27:53] for everything um but it's hard it's hard these  days with the culture and and social media and and  

[27:59] scrolling here and clicking on that no totally she  has no totally Delise what you were saying reminds  

[28:07] me every time I buy avocados from the grocery  store and they're not ripe I'm like every time I'm  

[28:13] reminded of like you cannot Rush an avocado like  no M you can't put it outside you can't put it in  

[28:19] the fridge like you literally have to wait until  it's ripe and it's the most frustrating thing at  

[28:23] times but every time I get an unwraped how do I  think of that but um no you guys are absolutely  

[28:30] right and you're hitting it right on the head uh  especially with social media and the fast-paced  

[28:35] life we're in we see women in different seasons  and stages and we think oh I can't wait to get to  

[28:41] that phase or stage or be in that season where I  get to do X Y and Z or I have more time for myself  

[28:47] to do X Y and Z uh but then what's so interesting  is and talks about all the time in scripture about  

[28:55] renewing your mind and making sure that you are in  the present moment because when you start planning  

[29:01] and as women we're great at planning ahead but  when you start planning so far in advance and  

[29:06] you start looking so far in advance you do start  getting anxiety and you do start getting anxious  

[29:11] and different things start coming into your mind  and then you start thinking to yourself okay well  

[29:15] if I want that how am I going to get there and I  don't have this in place yet and I don't have XYZ  

[29:19] and it's like I I like to remind people that  what is meant for you what God has meant for  

[29:24] you is never going to pass you by it'll come by in  his timing and it might be a lot longer shorter or  

[29:30] different you know span that you would like but it  it will come and it will come through his will the  

[29:37] way that it's supposed to it might be protecting  you from something as well and sometimes you just  

[29:42] got to thank God and for that page and that season  that you're in um and something that I've found  

[29:48] myself doing for years now um is just praying  for stronger shoulders during Seasons where I  

[29:55] am in waiting or seasons that seem a little bit  longer than others is just knowing that it'll  

[30:02] something amazing will come from it it might  take a little bit longer some seasons are so  

[30:07] fast and you're like where did that go like when  you you know you guys know when you have a newborn  

[30:11] and you're starting to pack away their clothes  for the first time and you're like what in the  

[30:14] world I blanked and now they're a year old um  so I don't know it's it's life is just kind of  

[30:21] crazy like that where you know you have certain  Seasons that you can't wait to get through then  

[30:27] other Seasons where you're just like I can't  believe how fast they they've gone and I think  

[30:32] in either of those moments you just got to like  we talked about earlier Delise like you said of  

[30:37] just being still in your home and just having that  moment of Stillness to absorb every type of season  

[30:43] and be so present for life and be so present for  every moment and absorb it for where it where it  

[30:49] is and where it's at and just live like that I  think is really special yeah you make me think  

[30:56] of the word sacred the time we have with our kids  is sacred the time we have with our C with cousins  

[31:04] with our husbands it's sacred um how do you think  we can keep this sacredness in our parenting in  

[31:11] our marriages um even in the world today as crazy  as it may be oh gosh this world's nuts I mean it's  

[31:18] nuts I I but then I think to myself I am so glad  I am in this moment to where you are living at a  

[31:29] point in time where now more than ever your faith  has to be so on fire and so just just bold because  

[31:38] you have no other option like the enemy is taking  up all different angles and trying to get to your  

[31:44] kids in all different aspects and facets of life  that it's like you have to you got to be just so  

[31:54] like your you have to keep your your sword so  sharp um and so it's one of those things where  

[32:01] you just have to yes of course pray but also make  sure that your partner is in tune with everything  

[32:07] that you're doing and just being I mean I can't I  just it's a crazy time but at the same time it's  

[32:15] one of those things where it's like it's what an  opportunity in a moment to be able to live live  

[32:22] boldly for Christ yeah yeah I I love I mean so  many people quote this first but there's a reason  

[32:28] why we were chosen for such a time as this and  and I'm excited about it I mean especially looking  

[32:35] back on History especially as a black woman in  America this is the time in history I want to  

[32:40] be here this is my moment I'm here now yeah and  I'm super excited about it and I'm hopeful um I  

[32:47] think for every good reason in Christ because he's  promised me you know greater things in him he is  

[32:54] bringing Heaven here to Earth and he's creating  a new new Earth which is amazing um and with  

[33:00] that too you know something else I think of just  with what you just said Jenny about sacredness and  

[33:04] parenting you know a lot of us are all across the  board and obviously we want to say from the get  

[33:10] up follow the convictions that the Lord has placed  on your heart and and ask him you so that you will  

[33:16] know the convictions that he's placed on your  heart when it comes to this and one Arena where  

[33:21] we're doing this actively is on social media you  know you have a fairly public life much more than  

[33:26] us but we're all on this thing called the internet  totally and we're all trying to navigate I think  

[33:31] in a way that no generation before us has what  it looks like to walk out our faith to be people  

[33:38] of family um and and how to Steward that well  and I know that one of the things that you've  

[33:46] talked about is just the way that that looked  for you early on as a mom and you're still pretty  

[33:50] early on but really early on um and I'd love to  hear just you share a little bit about what the  

[33:55] process was for you seeking the Lord in that and  him helping you to understand where he wanted you  

[34:00] to sit if that sense totally no for sure so  for me when I was before I had I call her G  

[34:08] we call her gigg her name's jevie but before we  had our baby um something for me is I literally  

[34:15] became I became a Hermit and not in a bad way but  I literally tucked away from I stopped I used to  

[34:22] go to every single Charlie and I were on the road  probably 320 some days out of the year I traveled  

[34:27] with him everywhere and I all of a sudden when I  found out I was pregnant I just stopped I didn't I  

[34:34] just I stayed home my focus actually became my  mom uh because I was I when I found out I was  

[34:43] pregnant I went back to the beginning when Mary  by you know when she found out or went through  

[34:50] the Immaculate Conception all of that and then  went to Elizabeth and that interaction that they  

[34:56] had together that was so intimate and so beautiful  to me the sacredness and all of that was spending  

[35:03] time with my mom to learn from her more Focus  than before um by serving her because I she's  

[35:12] on a a very interesting medical journey by serving  her and learning from her and asking her so many  

[35:19] more intentional questions because I knew that  once my little one was here my focus was going to  

[35:24] shift and so there's just a lot of things in this  world that I think that have lost the sacredness  

[35:31] whether that's marriage whether that's um you know  things within your home and your kids but I think  

[35:37] for me there's something really really sacred  within pregnancy that gets uh kind of Tainted  

[35:46] in today's world with social media because it's  like look I'm pregnant blasted on social look I'm  

[35:51] having a baby girl or a baby boy and blast it  on social and it's like if social media wasn't  

[35:55] around would you even you know have to take all  those photos and make all those announcements  

[36:01] but there was something really sacred that I was  saying that I was reading in scripture early on  

[36:05] was that it was so private and it was so intimate  and it was so prayed upon uh with Elizabeth and  

[36:12] Mary that um I just thought that that was really  Priceless to absorb early on in pregnancy prior to  

[36:20] having um my baby and there's just there's just  something even to this day about privacy that's  

[36:27] really sacred that's not I mean not everything  has to be on social media and I know we say that  

[36:32] and then it's like okay then we do post stuff on  social but there really is something to be said  

[36:37] for keeping just a pocket of your life for just  you and your husband or you your husband and your  

[36:41] kids or just you and your family or even just you  and God like there's certain things like when I  

[36:45] found out I was pregnant for the first few I  could say several hours I it was just me and  

[36:52] God who knew and that was really cool and then I  well you you God in the child within you but then  

[36:59] obviously it's just between you and your husband  and then it's you your husband and your family so  

[37:03] there's certain stages of sacredness but yeah I  think it's really special to be able to um really  

[37:08] pocket out certain things in your life that you  want to remain that way and other things that  

[37:12] you're willing to you know share with the world  yeah I love how you just you know related Mary and  

[37:19] Elizabeth and how the season of life was just so  prayed upon that just those words so prayed upon I  

[37:25] think we can all as mother do that wherever we are  whether we are pregnant right now and wondering  

[37:30] oh do I tell people yet or you know whether we  have adult children or whatnot um every season  

[37:37] of life can be so prayed upon totally I totally  agree yeah and it's it's one of those things  

[37:43] too I think as we're thinking through modeling  what what characteristics we want our children  

[37:49] to to prize if you will or to emulate um that's  something I want them to to understand and the  

[37:57] word that came to mind when you were describing  that for me was holy you know like set apart what  

[38:02] are those things and what does that look like  because especially something like Holiness is  

[38:07] very hard for us to wrap our minds around right um  but it could even be just as simple as friendship  

[38:13] you know not everybody is your friend no 100%  and you don't need a ton of friends you don't  

[38:19] need a ton of friends and and you don't need to  tell them you can be kind without being friends  

[38:23] you know there are so many different layers to  it and and you know in therapy that's one of  

[38:28] those things that my therapist is always talking  about is those circles of influence and Circles  

[38:31] of connection and access and and that's what it  looks like to know how to have good boundaries you  

[38:37] know to know okay this is a line that I'm going to  draw and again it doesn't need to look unkind but  

[38:42] not everybody has the right to have access to you  in all ways and there's freedom in that and once  

[38:48] you know then you don't feel so obligated so true  it's so true I remember my uncle a long time ago  

[38:55] when I first when it came out that Charlie and I  were um dating or engaged or whatever because we  

[39:00] kept our life very private with that I got the  most hellacious comments on my social media from  

[39:08] trolls and all this stuff and on and I on my  heart I was like oh my gosh these people are  

[39:13] so mean like they're calling me things I've never  been called before and like I know I'm not that  

[39:18] and like I found myself starting to respond to a  few of them and I I remember talking to my uncle  

[39:22] and he was like Erica literally put people in  your on a scale between one and five five being  

[39:29] the most important one being the least important  like if they are a five yes respond if they are  

[39:34] a one keep on moving like you don't have time you  don't have time and if they're not going to take  

[39:38] the time to get to know you or learn or whatever  or be in they're not going to be in your life for  

[39:41] a while whatever they're just trolls it's not  worth it like just keep going you don't have  

[39:46] the time take that time and pour it into the fives  instead of the ones and then ever since then ever  

[39:51] anytime I get something on my Instagram of someone  that's mean I'm like hi one [Laughter] it's okay  

[39:58] I'll leave you there I'll leave you on red there  you go and Gigi needs that you no totally that's  

[40:06] the truth I know that is so true well Erica if you  could just throw out after talking about all this  

[40:13] stuff if you could throw out one encouraging  statement paragraph whatever you've got for  

[40:17] us throw it out into the world for for moms and  women to hear today what would you say to them  

[40:24] I would just say be thankful and find gratitude  in the seasons and the things that you're going  

[40:29] through in life I've I was recently reading um  I believe it was in it's either Luke or John I  

[40:38] want to say it's in Luke where Jesus heals the 10  lepers and only one only one of them came back to  

[40:47] thank Jesus and he was like where are the other  nine and it was just this one that came back like  

[40:52] literally he fought to find Jesus to come back  to thank him and and I thought to myself that's  

[40:57] so powerful like how often do we find ourselves  going back to Jesus just as quickly as possible  

[41:06] to be able to say thank you and and instead  of constantly giving petitions have gratitude  

[41:12] come before that and I just think that the more  grateful we are the less we have time to talk  

[41:16] about other people the more grateful we are the  less time we have to complain about our life the  

[41:20] more grateful we are you know and it's not saying  okay like God forbid you got a cancer diagnosis or  

[41:26] something and you're like thank you God for  that like obviously you're not going to say  

[41:28] that but you can say thank you God for being the  ultimate healer thank you for putting doctors in  

[41:34] my life that you know have the an opportunity to  be able to find different solutions or treatments  

[41:41] or cures or or whatever that may be and there's  just gratitude to be found in every every aspect  

[41:46] even in even in the hardest ones and um just to  remind all of us even myself at times that even  

[41:53] though it might seem that you're you know going  uphill and you feel like everything's against  

[42:00] you like yes God is for you but there's also a  breakthrough that's coming in a lot of that and  

[42:05] you just got to keep going and if you just keep  building and yes you're battling with gratitude  

[42:11] but if you just keep going um everything does end  up um you know in accordance to his will which is  

[42:17] better than you could have ever you know dreamed  or asked or or anything like that so yeah I just  

[42:22] say keep moving forward keep being grateful yes  our world is crazy right now our cult is crazy our  

[42:27] country is crazy everything's crazy but just be  grateful that we have breath in our lungs and our  

[42:31] heart is beating in our chest to be able to make  a difference to be able to have conversations to  

[42:36] be able to communicate and engage with one another  on a level that's so intentional and so beautiful  

[42:43] where you can as a community come together and  really make a difference uh like you guys said  

[42:49] for such a time as this like Esther so yeah I'm  just grateful to have this time with you guys I  

[42:54] really appreciate it thank thank you well the last  thing we always like to ask cuz on the show we say  

[43:01] that we believe you can hold tissues and confetti  at the same time it's true yeah it's true how can  

[43:06] we throw some confetti with you and celebrate  oh you're so sweet uh well I am um what when  

[43:12] is this going to be airing this is going to air  early next year we're we're getting perfect so I  

[43:18] will then announce it now because um I as you guys  are listen to this it's already happened but we're  

[43:25] going to throw conf stud towards it uh next month  we're going to be releasing our youth in toddler  

[43:32] line for proclaimed Street Wear uh this I know I'm  so excited it's something I've been praying on and  

[43:38] I told myself from the beginning when I started  Proclaim Street Wear because everything's made  

[43:41] in the USA all organic cotton I'm psycho about our  Fabrics I told myself I'm never going to get into  

[43:47] kids clothes because it's too oversaturated and  like it's just kids grow out of stuff so quickly  

[43:53] more and more I've been getting emails from  mothers that are just devastated being like  

[43:57] I can't find a shirt for my son that doesn't have  a flower on it or you know different things on it  

[44:05] or you know you guys know what's going on with all  that stuff so I uh prayed on it and our team came  

[44:13] together and we're releasing that line next month  I'm so excited but also what I'm excited about  

[44:19] and my husband and I prayed on it and we talked  about it we're going to be adjusting our prices  

[44:24] for proclaim Street Wear because I'm the point  now where it's like I don't understand like you  

[44:30] guys were mentioning it earlier how expensive it  is to eat organic and eat clean well it shouldn't  

[44:35] be Breaking the Bank either to be able to wear  clothes that or are organic and are clean and  

[44:40] are not going to mess with your hormones because  a lot of clothing that is out there has a lot of  

[44:48] um disruptors in it and you guys can do your own  research on that but there's certain things and  

[44:54] certain dyes that have been recalled especially  that have led in them or certain things that  

[44:59] can impact your child negatively so for us we  wanted to make sure that it's all holistically  

[45:04] made in the USA healthy affordable and um also  you know it helps towards spreading the good  

[45:13] news so yeah yay that was the first thing that I  checked when I went on that website I was like I  

[45:19] want to short for my son I'm so sorry well it's  okay you're doing it by the time this releases  

[45:25] but I'll be sure to send you guys some stuff for  for your kids when um they everything comes out  

[45:30] next month so we are so excited for you thank  you for this great conversation you guys yeah  

[45:36] if our followers uh want to follow you where  can they find you at I'm mostly on Instagram  

[45:41] Miss Erica Kirk and then um our podcast midweek  midweek rise up um can be on found on any of the  

[45:48] podcast uh shows whatever Apple podcast Spotify  all those things and then um Proclaim Street .c  

[45:56] and that's where you can also join Bible in 365  and all the proceeds from our procin street wear  

[46:03] line um a majority of them go towards Bible  in 365 to keep that free for everyone so yeah  

[46:09] that's just that's that love it well thanks girl  all right you guys are awesome well guys we hope  

[46:16] you enjoyed that show I know I had a lot of  fun just talking about the the real side of  

[46:22] motherhood but also some of the things that we're  navigating and it was really encouraging to me  

[46:27] honestly to talk to Erica um like she said at the  end of the show please go check out proclaimed  

[46:33] Street Wear make sure that you go take a look  at that and everything else that she's doing  

[46:37] um give her some encouragement and send the show  to a friend if you think that it would also lift  

[46:41] them up so go follow us over on social media at  blessings andm motherhood we'll see you next time

[46:46] [Music] bye